Owie!

I did the total body extreme workout again tonight. I must admit, I did not workout besides going to troupe this week. I had many opportunities, truth be told. I was in soreness-hell for the first two days after my initial workout, but after that faded, I just didn't carve out the time to do it. I definitely had the opportunity, but no motivation. I will weigh myself in the morning to be sure, but I'm going to guess that I gained some weight. It frustrates me, because I'm RIGHT on the edge of being in the "normal" BMI range for my height. I last weighed in at 165.2.

My mom's student show is on the 29th, so that gives me just over a week to get that goal taken care of. I'm seriously done worrying about it, and having that small victory over the scale will definitley push me to lose more before the holiday season really sets in. I know last year I didn't gain anything, but I also didn't lose, after eating lots for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

My original goal was to be around 145-150 by the end of the year, and I can still get pretty close if I commit to eating right and exercising. I've already lost a lot of weight this year, I can keep going!

I'm ravenous and shaky...

I just competed the first workout I've done in a long, LONG time.

I honestly cannot remember the last time I did an exercise TV workout, or popped a Zumba DVD... I did do half a core workout from P90X with Matthew last month, but I don't count that as actually working out since I didn't get sweaty enough to warrant a shower.

This afternoon I was sitting on the couch wondering what to do next... when I pulled up Blogger to write an entry here, but then realized that I really didn't have a whole lot to talk about! I had done troupe on Sunday, but that was it in regards to exercise. So I started weighing my options with what I wanted to do in terms of cardio or weights and nothing really got me motivated... I considered going for a run (decided I didn't want to go out and discover how bad at running I've actually become), or doing P90X (I don't really want to deal with Tony today, and I don't want to make a 90-day commitment when I know I can't stick with it), or Zumba (I wanted to lift, not dance, today). Right when I was about to just pull out a couple sheets from Cosmo, I remembered the 10 Pound Slimdown. I was about to say "no way! I don't want to get THAT sweaty!" when I stopped myself and decided, if I want to make more changes to my body, I have to stop making excuses. So I pulled up the exercise on-demand to see if the program was even still available.

I was expecting to see the "10 Pound Slimdown" button and was very surprised to "10lb Xtreme Slimdown". Something new! I love trying new things!

And I certainly did see results after doing the regular Slimdown program, so I think hitting the ground running with this slightly harder version will be just what I need.

And I CERTAINLY gave my muscles a huge jolt. Today was Full-Body extreme, plus bonus buns. I was shaking and drenched at the end of the 40 minute full-body workout. She had a lot of the same moves as her other workouts, but there were a lot of new ones, different cardio drills and a FOURTH circuit. Oh my GOD those circuits work your butt off (literally, I hope!) I couldn't even do the buns workout, and believe me, I tried. I was taking my shower, and had difficulty keeping my arms lifted to wash my hair, and my leg was shaking when I lifted my foot to wash my toes. And now I'm waiting not-so-patiently for dinner, because I'm feeling weak with hunger.

Okay, so I just ate, half a filet of pan-seared tilapia, half a scoop of instant mashed potatoes, one fiber granola bar, and a couple spoonfuls of blueberry yogurt. Then I washed it down with a cup of ice water along with a multi-vitamin and calcium tablets. I feel very satisfied, even though I know I could have eaten a lot more. Earlier today I had an egg with cheese on a piece of buttered toast, plus a big mug of coffee and a weight watchers ice cream bar.

I'm really proud of myself for restarting the fitness routines. I won't be able to follow her weekly plan exactly, because I don't have a lot of time to work out most days. But I CAN stick to a better eating plan, and I promise to make the workouts a priority -- to not skip it when I actually have the time. I'm worth it!

But I am definitely going to be feeling today's workout in the morning WOO boy.

I'm going to measure my body and then weigh myself in the morning so I can track my progress accurately. Here are the stats:

Bicep at armpit: 13 inches
Chest w/ bra: 36.5 inches
Ribcage: 29 inches
Waist at smallest part: 28.5 inches
Tummy pooch: 38 inches
Upper hip (right under tummy pooch) 38 inches
Lower hip (right above thighs, across pubic bone) 40 inches
Thigh at crotch: 25 inches

In contrast with 6 months ago: 12.5 in bicep, 37 in chest, 30 in ribcage, 28.5 waist, 38.5 in upper hip, 41.5 in lower hip, and 25.5 in thigh. In total: 4 inches lost!

I'm still hovering right above the "normal" BMI range for my height, and really hope I can get down below it this week -- it'd be a real motivator for me!

More later, I'm going to go stretch now!

A lot to say...

I hate going so long without writing but I was feeling pretty down for a few weeks there.

Neither Stewart Title nor Willows Boutique called me back after my interviews with them. I had another interview for a sales position at Macy's which went REALLY well until the end when I embellished the truth a tad and she pointed out that what I said was, in fact, discrimination on their part, and I didn't try to back track at all, which I should have.

But... It's all right. Turns out, an opportunity presented itself right when I was feeling defeated.

Olivia, my younger sister, had a complete falling-out with her ex-boyfriend (the father of her children) and she desparately needed someone to care for them nearly full-time. So now I am staying home with my son, earning some income and spending more time with my neice and nephew who I had only seen a handful of times in the past 9 or 10 months.

I'm not going to lie, it's been a challenge to get my son to adjust to having my attention divided among more kids, but it's also been good for him to play with a boy his own age on a regular basis. And like I said before, I'm glad I can earn some money while also staying home to raise my baby boy. That was the most heart-breaking part about a job for myself -- spending a lot of time each week away from him. And Matt's going back to school next week so that would be time where both his parents aren't with him. Even though watching all the kids has tried my patience, it's pretty much the best option for me, in my opinion.

In other news, I've been working on my family tree, and at this point, my pedigree is complete back to my great-great-great grandparents (and ALL 32 of my great-great-great-great grandparents too!) and the tree goes back to the late 1500s, to my 12th great grandparents. I've been working on Matt's part of the tree, so that our son can have a completed pedigree too. I'm going through looking for pictures of their gravestones to add to their entries.

Also, my son turned two years old last week! He's such an amazing little boy, and I can still clearly remember the day he was born. It's scary for me to think about the future. Eventually, my son's going to talk more, learn to use a toilet, learn to play sports, and swim and sing his ABC's. Even farther down the road, he'll learn to read and write, play an instrument, eventually go to college, meet the love of his life and possibly give me a grandchild someday! Holy crap that's such a crazy thought it doesn't even seem like a remote possibility. I'm going to step away from the subject, because it gives me butterflies and brings tears to my eyes.

Right now I'm watching the season premiere of Biggest Loser. I made the decision yesterday to do a little exercise, then today I weighed myself for the first time in two months, and to top it off the new season started without my knowledge that there was even going to be a new one before the end of the year. Two of these things together would just be a coincidence, but all three together is the universe's way of giving me a sign, I think.

Like I said, I weighed myself this morning. Because I haven't really been giving a flying rat's booty about eating right, cardio, strength training, calorie counting or any of that, I half-expected the scale to tell me I was back up in the one-seventies. It's basically the reason why I stayed away from the scale so long -- I was afraid it would tell me the truth, that I had regained more than I thought.

Well, imagine my surprise when I stepped on to discover I had only gained 0.9 pounds! That's a tenth of a pound every week! And, even though that adds up to 5 and a half pounds over a year, it means I've only been consuming 50 extra calories per day. That's pretty close to the amount of food I should be eating to maintain my weight.

On the other hand though, I feel like I've wasted two months just... not caring. Like if I had just spent 15 mins each day doing some cardio or weights, then stretching and eating a little more mindfully, I could easily have lost up to five pounds in that time. EASY.

But! I have started anew and I plan to keep on it through the end of the year. I started fresh by rearranging my living area today. I like the layout a lot better. Jamison (and Gordon) have different areas to play, a book corner, a full table to work at, lots of toys and more space, since I was able to create better storage areas for our boxes and things.

I'm generally wiped after a day of watching all the children, and after they are gone, it's usually too late for me to take a shower so I avoid doing things that get me really sweaty. Today was great because I was cleaning and pushing furniture around and generally worked my butt off, but I ate over a cup of chocolate frozen yogurt so I think I more than cancelled it out.

Here are my new goals: get down under 165 before Halloween. (Totally doable. I am 165.5 as I type this). I would actually like to be closer to 160 for my mom's student show at the end of the month, and then 155 for the belly dance competition in November.

More interviews...

Over the weekend I had my first brush with fame. My mom's fifth-Saturday show/potluck this month wasn't as well-attended as the last, but we had a decent showing. Candice, my mother's long-time friend and self-declared "twin" arrived with her husband and two other people I didn't recognize. She has four boys that are grown, so I figured it was one of them plus his wife.

Come to find out, it was actually Project Runway Season 7 WINNER, Seth Aaron Henderson! He went to school with Candice's boys and he's been a family friend of theirs ever since. They had spent nearly all day out on the river, and she somehow convinced him and his wife to attend the show!


So I danced for Seth Aaron. And I hope he was impressed.


Wasn't feeling too body-confident that weekend. I feel like I've lost a lot of muscle-tone, and it makes me look flabbier than I am. I just lack the motivation to keep up the exercise. I love it, but I feel like I'm in a major funk. I'm hoping getting my professional life together will jumpstart the rest of my life.


And I definitely have some good news on that front.


I got a call from an unknown number at 6 o'clock Friday evening, which turned out to be from the title company I had applied to the previous day. The only number she gave me was the main line and the office was closed all weekend, so I didn't hear back after I left a message Saturday morning.


The same day I applied for the job at the hotel (the one that I, unfortunately, didn't get), I applied for a job as a sales associate for a boutique in downtown Vancouver. I knew right away which boutique the ad was talking about (Willows) and thought I'd be a pretty good fit -- if I have to go back into retail to get a secure paycheck, that would be the kind of place I'd like to work. I had given up on this job two weeks ago, because I never heard back. Well, last Sunday I got a call in the evening from the owner, Shandy. I called back the next day around two (after about two hours of deliberation and self-kicking) and set up an interview for four o'clock. Talk about short notice!


On the way to the store I got a call back from Stewart Title. I missed the call by a minute! So I hopped out of the car and used my extra couple of minutes to call her back. I set up an interview for the next day (today). Then I walked to my interview with Shandy! I was still a few minutes early and had to wait a while for the owner and her daughter to have a moment to spare, but once they did, we were talking about everything from my son and my mother's grandchildren, to my hobbies and interests, my background at Target and my ability to deliver customer service.


I mentioned my brush with Seth Aaron, and her face lit up! She pointed out that she carried his line BEFORE he was on the show, and to top it all off, her daughter was on the phone with him right that minute! They had just sold a huge order of his t-shirts and needed more merchandise and shipment information. That was the reason I had to wait for them to start the interview!


Overall, it went wonderfully. I've got the experience, and I have the friendly, helpful personality. They didn't discuss wage, but the hours would be weekends, and a few days out of the week, for a total of about 30 hours per week. My issue would be the weekends, because I have troupe on Sundays, but at this point I need a job more than I need to be at troupe every weekend.


The interview I had today was for the receptionist position at Stewart Title. I think about this interview and my heart starts pumping. I want it bad. It's 40 hours per week (8 - 5) at ten dollars per hour. It's in downtown Vancouver (only ONE bus to take!!!), and it's a job I could DO and be GOOD at.


She seemed to like me. I'm concerned that I didn't sell my personality enough though. She said being outgoing was an important aspect, but when asked me if that sounded like me, I talked about being goal-oriented, which, even as I type that seems like I skirted that issue. I wish I had talked up how I'm naturally shy but work hard to be sincerely sociable and friendly. I'm absolutely kicking myself about it, but if it costs me the position so be it. Learning experience.


But I'm not admitting defeat until I'm for certain defeated. Not my style.


If my wildest dream comes true and I get offered BOTH jobs, I'd have to go with Stewart Title., simply because the hours are better, but it hurts my heart to think about turning them down. They already feel like family at that boutique and I'm sure I'd love it there, but I just see myself fitting in better in an office situation. And they'd have to pay me over 13 dollars an hour to make the money I'd make there.


I really don't want to jinx myself, though. Most likely, I won't be offered either job. There are LOTS of fish in this employ-me pool. I would be foolish to think they couldn't find someone better than me to do the job.


I'm feeling kinda choked up about it right now. There's only so much I can do to make myself look like an asset to their team! Plus, if I can get interviews out of these opportunities, I can certainly find more...

But for now it's a waiting game. Stand-by!

I didn't get the job :(

The short of it is, on Thursday afternoon I recieved an email saying they chose their second interview candidates, and they wished me the best of luck in my job search.

Well, awesome. I nearly started crying, just from the release of stress about it all, but I managed to hold it together and I'm doing fine now.

We took a two-hour long, 4.5 mile hike through the trails near our house and it was beautiful! There were thick woods, open-areas, a creek and unpaved walkways throughout. Matt wore our son on his back and we trekked much farther than I thought we would. We've decided that, next time we go, we will skip the northern part of the trail and head south right away, so we can explore further toward the park down there. It doesn't loop around perfectly, but from what I've read it's a fun hike.


Also... I'm back on the weight-loss train! Besides the splurged dinner plus ice cream last night, I've eaten pretty healthfully. I'd really like to be at 160 by Jamison's second birthday, and as long as I stay on track and exercise I know I can easily do it, perhaps even surpass it!

Back on the topic of the job search, I've got another interview Thursday at the YMCA. I'm not too confident about the position, because on their site they say they want people with 2 years previous experience in a liscensed care facility, which I don't have. In my defense, though, the Craigslist ad said nothing about formal training/etc. I've got about 8 years of childcare and babysitting under my belt, and I would really like to go into Early Childhood Education.

But I don't see how you get INTO a liscensed place if you need experience first. Well, if nothing else it'll be even MORE interview (and rejection) experience... and I could use more of that.

I also may have an interview at a printing store in Portland. The only problem there is that the ad was looking for someone with a valid drivers liscense... and I must've not seen that part because I applied anyway. Great.

But! I feel confident that I could pass the driving test given a couple days of practice... unfortunately my permit expired in April and it costs money to renew it... :/

*SIGH*

It's like, if I could just find a job everything would be so much better. I could start repaying some of my loans and bills... I could get my wisdom teeth pulled, I could go back to school for an even BETTER job! Then we could save for our own vehicle and eventually move into our own place... we could get married!

And it all starts with a job...any job.

More later.

It's been a while, I apologize

I'd like to be able to say here that I stuck to my diet, and continued to lose weight over these past few weeks, but that didn't happen... I've gained about 2 pounds back and I'm not doing too much to reach my goal of 155 by September either.

I feel like I'm in a major funk. I don't feel like exercising, I crave carbs and sugar... I sit around on the internet for the majority of the day and I wait until I absolutely HAVE to get up to get out of bed.

I'm thinking I may have very mild depression. I felt very similar to this while I was up in Seattle. I don't care to do anything fun, but it's not so bad that I neglect other duties in my life.

I didn't get that job Olivia had tried to set up for me. It went to a girl who already worked at the store.

A couple good things have happened though. Matt got a few unemployment checks, so we haven't gone under quite yet... unfortunately he quit applying for benefits so we won't get anymore checks. He did get accepted to PCC and will restart the EMT program, which is better than Clark's program becuase it will go from Basic to Intermediate and then he can apply to the paramedic program afterward. Here in Vancouver, you have to have one year of EMT-B experience before you can move up, but there are no jobs for EMT-B's in this economy - the ambulance services cut back employments so they are only taking paramedics.

Also, I've started applying for just about every job I'm qualified for on Craigslist, and last week I got a hit! They invited me back for a job-fair open-house interview thing. There were twenty of us there and we were all competing for two front desk jobs at their hotel.

I had originally applied to the ad because whoever wrote it seemed really cool -- it wasn't stuffy and I actually laughed when I read it! They wanted a cover letter that was "fun or even funny" because their staff like to have fun and it was such a breath of fresh air to not draft a formal CV. What was even better was recieving the invite to the open house. It gets frustrating to send out so many resumes and not recieve even a "thank-you but...".

So I prepared for the interview by doing some research on the hotel and was pleasantly surprised -- I expected a place very much like the others: a sterile, hospital-like big-box hotel like so many I've stayed in. Instead, I found a bright and colorful inn smack dab in the center of a bustling part of Portland - it was pure Portland: orange walls, local art, jars of candy all over the lobby, the funkiest carpet I've ever seen, and every room is a suite with a kitchen and stove. I WANT this job. I don't care how far away from home it is, I want to work there more than anything else.

So yesterday was the big day. I took a total of three buses and a max to get to the hotel, which took me two hours. In a car on a clear-traffic day, it's only 12 miles and a 20 minute drive. I got to the hotel with about ten minutes to go and sat in the lobby with about twenty other hopefuls. They set out some refreshments and I got a cup of diet Coke along with a couple Ritz crackers, a piece of salami and some cheese. Then Denise, the General Manager came in with her crew and positioned themselves around the room and the masses swarmed. I decided to wait a little while before meeting any of them. It seemed like too many of the people were jumping down their throats, and they seemed more the laid-back type of group so I sat and observed for the first twenty minutes.

There was a couple of points at which I felt like this was a waste of my time - that I wasn't even in the running for this job. But then I actually talked to one of the other candidates and she was really cool (though she smelled sweaty... poor thing) and then talked as a group with the front desk guy Tim, who was really fun. At that point, I saw a spot open up to talk to Brandon, the Front Desk Lead and it had been over an hour since the interviews started so I decided I should take the opportunity to sit with him. Tim had told everyone that Brandon was a brownie-hoarder, so I told him that as part of our small-talk and he said his true weakness was cookies. Well, I make MEAN chocolate-chip cookies from scratch and didn't hesitate to tell him so. He wrote that down on his notepad next to my name. Then we got into the the basics - my work history, customer service experience, whether I knew the area, my availability etc. He talked about the same amount of time that I did, about the duties and the guests and how great the staff are. It was short and sweet, which was perfect for me -- I had seen so many people talking these guys' ears off - over ten minutes each, and they were forcing their way onto all four of them!

I was really hoping to come across as humble, friendly and willing to work hard, not aggressive and pushy and overqualified like some of the others came across to me.

Anyway I came back into the room and the front desk manager Angela was free to talk to so I mosied on over to sit with her. She was so nice, but she was also a much better interviewer than Brandon -- more structured for sure. She asked what brought me to the hotel besides the job interview (...uh... that's the only reason, but I love the hotel!) and then asked me, if I were to describe the hotel to someone, what would I say? (Hmm... very colorful, like retro funk threw up all over the place, awesome lobby, great personnel, it feels like home instead of a hospital, it's right next to the trendiest area full of shops and restaurants to explore, plus it's on the streetcar line which takes you through all of downtown Portland and connects to MAX and other buslines so all of the city is accessible..) she loved my last line, "If you're looking to experience what Portland is all about, this is the place to stay." Then she went through the basics that Brandon had touched on, customer service experience, availibility, plans to go back to school, etc. She said the people they're losing were some of their best -- big shoes to fill.

I could fill those shoes. I've got the drive, and I'm willing to learn! And I think she saw that -- at the end of our talk she said they'd be calling people back within a week and she told me that I'll be recieving a call.

OMG REALLY!???!?! I sincerely hope it wasn't just something they tell everyone. I really hope she was genuine and, having interviewed a lot of people before me, meant what she said. I thanked her warmly as I got up, and, with that as my high point, I went to the bathroom and walked out. I had considered possibly speaking to Denise as well, but there looked to be a line of people waiting their turn and it was nearly six so I left.

I'm wondering if I should send a thank-you note to the people I interviewed with. I have their email addresses, and something short and sweet would keep me in their mind, yes? Might as well give it a shot...okay. Thank-you notes sent!

I wish I could've done more, but it's in their hands now. If nothing else it gave me some interview experience. But until I know for sure, I'm going to continue to prepare as if the job is already mine. Gotta learn more about the hotel and the surrounding neighborhood, and practice other interview questions that may come up.

Anyway, after I left the hotel I took the bus back to the MAX, but was unsure where to get off. I made my best guess then headed toward where I thought the station would be but over-shot it by a block. I ended up at the Roseland theater and had to walk north one block. Well, I passed by a small group of black people, most of whom were sitting on a bench but one LARGE women who looked like a prostitute was standing. I had my iPod on almost full blast and was lip-synching as I passed them, but could feel their eyes on me. Suddenly the lady starts YELLING at me. Like, FULL volume. She called me a bitch or some such, then told me in black-girl slang that I need my skirt shorter, and my pumps with the flowers do not match my shirt. When I kept walking away, not acknowledging her in anyway, she yelled "babygirl!" at my back, and said I could "learn a thing or two" from her...

Fashion advice from a prostitute? Laughable.

Anyway, it's taken me six hours to write this entire post, and I'd like to wrap up by saying this won't be the end if I get rejected. I've promised to find a job this month and I intend to do it. Not only do we need the financial support of atleast one income, Matt's chances of getting a job to conform to his school schedule this fall is slim...

I'll write again soon, count on it.

Huge surprise!

Can't hardly believe it, but I've lost 2.2 pounds in 11 days! And that was after I lost nearly a pound for the student show!

The Wii has me weighing at 165.6, very very close to a BMI of 25, which is considered healthy! I'm gonna tell you a secret, promise not to judge me?

I haven't recorded an ounce of food, I have barely exercised, and I'm at the tail-end of my period. I've spent handfuls of hours lazing around reading, and watching TV and just generally not caring about my health.

To my credit, I have been avoiding fast food, I drink plenty of water, I'm making sure I get more fruits and veggies, and I haven't stuffed myself. My portions are more reasonable. To my discredit, I haven't avoided sugary desserts (like cookies, and brownies, hot cocoa, coffee, candy bars, chocolate chips, etc.) but I don't binge on them daily - they're a treat more than anything.

I watched an interesting documentary about diet and learned that the lipid hypothesis (the belief that fats make you fat, that saturated fats raise your cholesterol, that vegetable oils are healthier than butter for cooking, and on and on) is a bunch of hooey that agricultural businesses came up with. The film basically said that the health problems of Americans have skyrocketed in the past 50 years or so not due to a boom in fast food, but due to all the misinformation about nutrition. Because it all sounds like a huge conspiracy theory, I'm really thinking about starting my own research into this documentary's claims. If for nothing else that to learn more about nutrition in its own right.

In more personal news, Matt and I are at the point in his unemployment where we are really beginning to feel it. Luckily, we pay only $200 per month for room and board, and we've slowed down our spending tremendously, but there are expenses we haven't cut, and it has become very evident that we need an income, quick. My sister Olivia told me about an opening at her job. She works in the deli of a grocery store and told me to apply for a position in the bakery. I then called the human resources department, which I've never done before ever, but Olivia told me to, and am now waiting for a call back. She said both her friends that she recommended for jobs that did what she told them to do got hired, so I'm really hoping the same goes for me.

Unfortunately, waiting is a bitch, pardon my French. It's been a week since I applied and called for the job. Olivia told me to have patience, her friend Rachel didn't get the call until 2 weeks later. When I told her that was so long, she pointed out that she DID get hired though. I had to concede... I guess it's better to receive a call two weeks later and get the job than it is to receive a call the next day and be told you aren't what they're looking for.

Still, I don't like waiting. We need income now, and Matt isn't really looking as hard as he could, plus we haven't received ANY unemployment checks because of all the problems with his paperwork, he had issues claiming for the first five weeks or so, and now they are denying him benefits because they believe he is a full-time student, which he is not.

I swear, if it had been MY unemployment benefits I would have done everything 100% perfect, but he just assumed the whole thing would be a piece of cake - he didn't read anything they sent him, he waits until the very last minute to send the forms and letters in, and then he gets angry when it doesn't all fall in his lap.

It's very frustrating, to say the least. Hopefully, I get this job, Matt's mom doesn't freak out about me having a job but her son still being unemployed. I haven't even told them I have this job possibility, mainly because I don't want them asking annoying questions about it.

This economy is tough. Matt and I both thought he would be right back out there working, and that if we had to I could get a retail job easily. Unfortunately, there is a large hiring pool for employers to choose from, so they seem to be very picky about who they hire.

It'll turn around for us. And then I can start saving to pay off past student loans and possibly start going back to school. More later.

I've been bad...

I haven't blogged in over a week, and that's because I haven't kept track of my food intake and I haven't been exercising.

At all. Blahhhhh.

But! I have picked my butt up and decided today is the day I jump back into it. I just finished doing a 50 minute Zumba routine. I'm going to record everything I eat from here on out, and my goal is to not skip anything all Summer!

The main motivator for this change was my performance this Saturday. It'll be my first solo in years - my last solo being the Vegas competition back in July of 2009 when I was seven months pregnant (and won third place out of ten dancers!!!). Anyway, I want to look good for all of my mom's students and the other people that will be there. I don't know what I'm going to wear but I do know what I'm going to dance to.

I feel like I probably gained a lot, and I constantly feel tired and sluggish. It really seems like a bad cycle - you skip a few days and then you start the ball rolling. You start to enjoy just sitting around watching hours of TV, and you procrastinate starting again. You stop logging meals because you're avoiding the truth and don't want to be reminded that you've fallen off the horse.

I haven't finished C25K yet... I've had one more week to go for a whole month now. I'd like to blame it on something but the simple truth is I've been avoiding it. I tend to shy away from my goal right as I stare it in it's nearly-completed face.

I plan to weigh myself tomorrow and my goal is to lose at least a pound before this weekend. Off to shower!

Went shopping today...

I needed a trip to the mall with my bestie - we took two buses and talked tons, she bought me my first ever bubble tea, which was delicious but just seemed like a cup of sugar-water, then I turned in some library books and we went to JC Penny. There, I tried on a couple pairs of jeans to discover I fit into size 12s nearly perfectly! The fourteens were too big! Unfortunately, I didn't have the cash to lay out 19.99 on one pair of jeans that might not fit at the end of the summer. But being a size 12 means there are MANY more options for me at discount stores! So we stopped off at Subway to have lunch and then to Ross. I tried on a size 12 pair of cheap jeans but they were way too long so I instead I bought a pair of bright pink cloth capri pants that have a drawstring thinking I'll be able to wear them all summer. They make my butt look really cute and they were only 7 dollars so I consider that purchase to be a success. I also got a new bra, just a basic beige t-shirt style. My bras are starting to wear out... the underwire pokes through, and the elastic is really starting to go slack. I only have two bras plus my sports bra that I can wear and feel comfortable in. Well - now I have one more.

I ate pretty terribly today, and didn't weigh myself, but yesterday when I fired up Wii Fit it said I weigh 168.9! Another pound gone, which I hope I didn't pick back up today but I walked A LOT so I hope that evens some of it out.

All in all, I spent 3.50 for the bus ride, 7 for the pants, 5 for the bra and 2.70 for lunch. Less that twenty bucks for a wonderful day out and about with my favorite girl :)

Tomorrow I'm babysitting for my sister and not going to troupe. (Hey! I would much rather EARN 20 bucks than SPEND 6.50 taking buses from here to downtown portland and back!) I suppose I could make up for the exercise loss by taking my Zumba DVDs and work out with the kids if they want. I'm debating whether or not to take Jamison over with me. Maybe I'll have Matt bring him over later in the day to play.

So all-in-all, today was excellent. I got a bunch of laundry folded and put away...

More later.

Finally in the 160's!

I weighed myself yesterday to discover I was 169.5 -- officially OUT of the 170's!!!!

And I really don't want to go back. EVER. I feel the best I ever have now. I tried on my old jeans again and I can button ALL of them! They zip up completely, and even though they are still a bit tight I could wear them if I had to! They are all size 11's, though they've probably stretched out a little because I wore them for a year and a half before I got pregnant, but yay! Size 11's!

Wonderful feeling, it really is. And it couldn't have come at a better time, because I no longer have jeans that fit. I'm wearing my black slacks right now, because they are the only pair of pants I have that don't fall down as I walk. My belt fell apart yesterday and is no longer usable unless I want to use some duct tape.

I just realized that yesterday was a pretty significant day altogether. My second Mother's Day, went to troupe and got to watch the troupe performance at showcase (which was GREAT!) danced for an hour, then came home and went to dinner with Matt. I discovered that I had lost a pound, putting me below 170, I tried on my old jeans and they all zip up - my belt broke, which means I can't wear my bigger jeans anymore unless I want to risk showing my crack to everyone.
Last time I tried them on, back in January, I could only pull one of the jeans all the way up and even then I couldn't muscle it together over my hips. Even my old khaki work slacks button without stretching across my crotch!

So, a huge scale victory and some non-scale victories on a special day for me!

On 3FatChicks, I joined a Summer challenge because my Cinco de Mayo challenge ended. (I got down to 170 by the fifth, so I consider that a victory!) The challenge I joined is called Luscious by Labor Day, and my goal is to be 150 by then. So far, I've lost half a pound and have 17 more weeks to go to lose the rest of the 20 pounds.

I can't even imagine, if I already fit into size 11's, what size I'll be once I lose the rest of the weight. My overall goal was to wear these jeans right around 155 but now I'm thinking I might be able to wear size 9's!

Single digit pants... that thought is a mind-boggling one, considering I haven't worn size 9's since freshman year of high school. I grew major hips that year, which pushed me from size 5 and 7 to size 9. Junior year is when I moved up into size 11, and then senior year and the few months I spent in Seattle pushed me up into size 13. After gaining 40 more pounds while pregnant, I wore size large maternity pants until I bought the size 15 jeans last Summer. Those jeans now fall down while I walk, and I can pull them down without unzipping them.

How is it that I didn't do this before? It astounds me that I was writing this blog all last year and didn't lose a pound. It's easy, once you push past the excuses and the doubts. Calories in, calories out, it WORKS.

I've been logging my food into my iPod for 8 weeks straight now. According to the application's statistics, I've exercised at least 3 times a week for those two months. I'm really anxious to get my calorie burn up again though. It's been lacking for the past three weeks. I still need to finish the C25K program, for which I only have three more runs to complete.

Alright. I'm done writing for today. Time to get this place cleaned up.

Just a few more ounces!!!

I finally pushed past that mini-wall of 171. Today I weighed myself, half expecting the scale to say something outrageous, like I had gone back up to 173 or something, but instead it delivered some excellent news!!!

I'm 170.2!!! Only .2 pounds to go until I am officially half way to my goal! 25 pounds gone, 25 more to go!

Saqra's showcase went really well last Saturday. The night before, I had to reinforce my leopard skirt with elastic because it was way too big! (The last time I wore it, nearly two years ago, I was seven months pregnant!)

Also, my copper bra and belt needed their clasps adjusted because they were also too loose. I took in a half inch around the ribs, and over an inch in the hips!

And I looked awesome in my pictures! After looking at my Rakkasah pictures, I was feeling pretty unhappy - my muffin top was so noticeable. But in the pictures from showcase, I barely have any extra spillage! This may have something to do with the fact that it was a different costume, but I think it has much more to do with the nearly 9 pounds I lost between then and now.

I don't know how I pulled a one pound loss over the weekend... I barely ate anything on Saturday, nearly overdid it Sunday and yesterday... I didn't do as much exercise as I should have this past week, and I can tell my period is going to come sometime in the next 7 days... the odds are against me here. I'm hoping upping my calorie count is what did it. I also cut out a lot of extraneous beverages and I try to drink more water throughout the day.

My biggest problem is my lack of motivation to get some exercise done. I've been procrastinating on my running big time. I haven't done Zumba in weeks, I haven't checked Exercise TV for anything interesting, and P90X is intimidating as hell.

Goal for this week: exercise four times.

Still no weight loss

I'm SO close to the half-way point in my weight loss journey... I only need a pound and a half more! Yet the scale continues to mock me... I lost nothing over the weekend.

Granted, there was an Easter dinner and a handful of candy (plus cookies and two mini pineapple upside down cakes!) to be eaten Sunday, but I danced for over two hours, so that should have taken care of it!

I upped my calorie intake and I haven't really noticed a difference in how full I feel, or anything like that. I did the P90X Core Synergistic DVD earlier tonight - it's the first step in my plan to do the entire P90X program. I'm thinking I'll do the P90X "Lean" program modification. It focuses more on cardio and less on resistance/weight training. Technically, it's for those of us who would like to lose fat and sculpt lean body mass, instead of bulking up like the Incredible Hulk.

It's just as intense as the classic program and I definitely was sweating at the end. I could do a lot of the moves... and didn't have to modify everything, yet my legs felt like jelly after the cool down!

Tomorrow is the Cardio X DVD if I want to continue with the program. I really would like to finish up the C25K program first (today was supposed to be W9D1 but I never got a chance to hit the pavement) before I move on to a new commitment so I'll really have to make a decision about it.

More later.

I'm determined to push past this plateau

I WANT to be down under 170. It's so close, yet it alludes me. I'm going up and down between 171 and 172 and cannot figure out why.

My calorie counts have been near-perfect. I've exercised every day this week, I've been drinking water like my life depends on it, (in a biological way it does...)

To reach my goal weight of 168 by Cinco de Mayo, I need to net between 1400 and 1500 calories per day, after exercise. That's more than I'm consuming now, my iPod app wants me to eat just over 1300 calories.

Maybe I should consume a bit more - it wouldn't be a problem, really. But it's scary to up your calorie intake while trying to lose weight, because it seems very counter-intuitive.

Plateaus generally occur because our bodies have become accustomed to the calorie deficit we've created, that is, our metabolic rate slows down enough that the amount of calories we consume more closely equals our energy expenditure.

Also, as we lose weight, our lighter bodies require less calorie burn to move. Things like dancing around require less energy, so we aren't burning as much as we originally were.

There are lots of ways to try to break a plateau. On way is to eat more for a week or two. The body may have stalled fat loss because it is in fat saving mode. In other words, it has become used to the reduced calorie diet and thinks this is the new normal, so it begins saving its fat stores in case calories get reduced even further (it's a survival technique to prevent starvation!). In order to convince your body to use up more body fat, you need to first convince it that food is plentiful and there's no need to hold on to the extra fat stores. You do this by eating about 100 or 200 more calories per day.

So... I guess I'll trust it, and I'll modify my food journal to reflect this change... Alright. It now says I should eat 1500 calories per day. I've already had a 200 calorie breakfast, and went for a run (which I KILLED, by the way. I was running at a pace of 12:30 min/mile!!! Next week is W9, and I'm excited to be able to say I completed the C25K program!)

I've also decided to start the P90X Lean program, which is geared toward women, but I won't start until after showcase, and after I'm done with the running program. Hopefully I can weave in some runs among all the intense cardio! But I'm excited to hopefully see some awesome results.

Broke down and made myself coffee

I made a promise not to drink anything but water until the showcase but I couldn't resist making a cup of joe today.

So far, I have not had any fast food - even though we did stop by Taco Bell one night a couple days ago. I held to my guns and chose not to get anything.

I haven't gone over my daily calorie counts at all, and I make sure to document every bite I take.

I also ran on Monday and Wednesday, and I did a 45 minute Zumba routine on Tuesday - today I plan on doing some sort of strength training, probably the P90X arms and shoulders, and ab ripper X.

Unfortunately, the scale hasn't budged at all this week, despite my overhaul of unhealthy habits, which I cannot understand. I'm hoping it's just a temporary mini-wall and my renewed attempts will yield a big weight loss before the show. I need to lose four more pounds in two weeks to reach my goal of 168 by Cinco de Mayo.

Doable, if I continue this plan and the scale cooperates!

C25K W8D1

I've got a 28 minute run today... my longest yet! I've mapped out a two-mile route for myself, and as soon as Matt finishes hit workout, I will be out there hitting the pavement!

Weighed myself this morning to discover I had gained just over a half pound this weekend, but even so, my weight is 171.5 - a pound and a half down from a week ago!

I'm hovering around a BMI of 26, and I'm really looking forward to saying goodbye to being overweight! Only 6 more pounds to go! I've got 12 days until Saqra's Showcase and I'm going to milk it. 1300 calories per day, Cardio and Strength everyday, only drinking water, and I'll hopefully be done with C25K by the event! That is, if the weather cooperates. I didn't go out but once last week because the weather was pretty dreadful. I just cannot bring myself to run while it's pouring. Sprinkling or misting is fine, in fact, it keeps me cool, but I hate being soaked to the skin and I don't have any water-proof jackets that can also breathe.

These sound like excuses but I'm just expressing how I feel here. We have a treadmill - perhaps I will get over my fear of using it and try it out this week if the rain threatens to keep me in.

I also need to get back on my Zumba train - I haven't popped in a DVD in almost two weeks. I just really didn't feel like doing it. Plus I'm missing my DVD remote and I need it to be able to do the Abs workout and the Cardio Party without the annoying assistance buttons on the bottom of the screen.

Again, these are sounding like excuses. But I'm done with excuses for the next two weeks. I'm doing it, and I hopefully will reach my goal of being 165 pounds at the Showcase.

Good news is, though, that I'm only 3 pounds away from my goal of 168, which is due by Cinco de Mayo! That's exciting, since when I joined the group I was unsure of whether I could pull a ten pound weight loss in six weeks.

One concern I have is Easter this year. I'm torn between going to troupe and staying home with Matt's family eating Turkey and potatoes and probably skipping a workout. I really need the extra practice but I don't want to offend the in-laws...

173 pounds

That's right, I lost another pound! Over the weekend. I ate out Friday night (but only drank water). We went out to breakfast at Shari's Restaurant Saturday afternoon, at which point I consumed around 1,100 calories worth of pancakes, eggs, hash browns, sausage and bacon (but again, I only drank water!). Luckily, I wasn't too hungry the rest of the day, and I exercised with Matt that evening. On Sunday I went to troupe, which included thirty minutes of double-veil practice, one hour of Tiger Lily Shaabi and drum solo practice, an hour and a half of advanced class and finally, a half hour of student troupe Shaabi and drum solo practice.

Three and a half hours of low-impact dance. That's around one THOUSAND calories burned. I had a few pieces of pizza that night plus a big glass of root beer yet my calorie count was nowhere near what I needed for the day. I ended the week in a major deficit, and it shows on the scale. I have officially lost five pounds in under 2 and a half weeks. If I kept up the pace, I could potentially hit my goal of being 168 early! Perhaps I could hit it before showcase!

My run today went well. I added an extended route and it was perfect length for my 25-minute run. My pace was a 13 min/mile. My next run is 28 minutes long, so I'm going to have to plan another extension!

Can't wait to see my progress this week! I'll keep you posted :)

How I managed weight loss this week is beyond me!

But according to the Wii, I weigh 174.1, which officially puts me over TWENTY POUNDS DOWN from my highest weight!

It's a great feeling, it truly is. I thought I was going to see a gain when I stepped on this morning, and when the scale tipped in the OTHER direction, I nearly jumped for joy!

I must confess, I went over my calorie counts on more than one occasion this week, had Burger King late one night, drank soda and ate red velvet cake for a birthday, and I only managed a small loss on Tuesday morning (after gaining a pound Sunday), plus I only worked out on Monday (P90X chest and back, read: PUSHUPS like nobody's business!)

Today, after learning that I had reached a mini-goal, decided to go for a run. Even though I had to stop a few times to fix my iPod, and wait for EVERY crosswalk to turn green, I kept a 13:30 pace.

I really need to work on distance more than time if I want to complete a 5K this June, but I'm on W7D3 next time I run, so I only have five-seven more workouts until I complete the C25K program. If I don't skip any runs, I could potentially be done by the 25th, and then I'll have two months to work on my endurance.

Sounds doable, especially if I continue to lose weight! And I refuse to let the pounds pile on ever again, so that's a given!

More soon!

Just finished another workout...

Yesterday I went over my calorie count by about 400... we had pizza and salad for dinner, I had a chocolate chip cookie and soda, and then later I ate a few chips with queso dip and drank a mojito.

Now, I'm far from feeling guilty. I realize there will be days like yesterday where my will power will be tested, and there will be temptations right in front of me, but I made the conscious decision to eat what I ate, and I also decided not to work any of the calories off. So I'm not going to spend any time dwelling on it - I picked my calorie counting back up this morning and did a full 50 minutes of Zumba, plus pulled my son in a wagon around the neighborhood for 30 minutes.

Also, yesterday I decided to try on the pair of dress pants I was given back in October. They are size 15, and when they were given to me, I could button them, and zip them, but it wasn't pretty. My belly was hanging over the top, the material was stretched over my thighs, and my butt looked squished. I just tucked them away in my drawer hoping I could one day look good in them. That day was yesterday!!! I put them on, they didn't cling to my hips and when I zipped them up, they camouflaged my little pooch instead of emphasizing it! I wore them all day, and never once felt self-conscious. Non-scale victory for sure!

Unfortunately, I'm wearing the new skinny jeans I bought for myself at the end of January and they are WAY too big in the waist now. I can pull them down without unbuttoning them, and they fall down even while I'm just standing. Also, the jeans I bought back in August are getting a touch too big, and forget about my black jeans I bought before Christmas - I'm swimming in them.

I don't know when I'll be able to buy new clothes next. Spring is here so maybe I'll wear more skirts and dresses until I hit smaller sizes closer to my goal weight!

Today I'm working to get my calories back on track - had oatmeal with walnuts and blueberries (the walnuts are CRAZY full of calories - mostly good fats though) and I had two cookies and a cup of root beer.

I'm ready for some dinner! Hope it's something healthy. More later.

Today's weigh-in...

...went WAY better than expected! Wii says I lost 1.3 pounds since Tuesday (I had apparently gained .7 pounds between Sunday and then but this makes up for it almost two-fold!).

My weight stands at just under 176 pounds. As is probably obvious, I'm VERY happy. Haven't starved myself at all this year, I feel stronger than ever, it's a great feeling!

Went for another run today, did C25K W7D1, so that officially starts me back on track for the program! I just felt exhausted over halfway through, and I found out just now, after plugging in my route online, that I was running at a pace of 13:11! That's my fastest EVER, especially running for so long... I had to stop at 24:30 because I felt like I was going to collapse. I wish I had completed the last 30 seconds, but I just didn't have anything else in me.

Next time, I'll know to set my pace lower so I can run longer (because I need to be able to run a 5K! Endurance, baby!) and to really focus on not overextending myself in the first half of my run.

Hopefully, this weight continues to melt right off - my friend Heaven just gave me a bag of cute clothes and they look fantastic on me!

I'd love to look just as fantastic in my dance costume for upcoming performances, specifically Saqra's showcase (29 days away), and my mom's student show at the end of May (8 weeks). I'm thinking a realistic goal will be 5 pounds each month, but I'd love to get closer to ten.

Goal 1: Cinco de Mayo challenge - 168.
Goal 2: "Normal" BMI - 165
Goal 3: Size 13/14 pants

Hitting the pavement again!

Lacing up my running shoes and getting back out there yesterday felt so good. I've been looking forward to this all Winter.

I went out there on a whim, it was wet and cold and near sundown, and I had a bowl of chili sitting in my stomach, but I just decided to go for it.

And I'm really glad I did. I set my iPod to the Week 6 Day 2 intervals (10 mins jogging, 3 mins walking, 10 mins jogging), thinking that I could run at least 10 minutes straight, and if I didn't need the 3 minute break, GREAT! I'd keep running through it. I resigned myself to take it slow, steady, to not get winded, to take drinks out of my water bottle and to not give up.

And I did it. All 23 minutes of running, I DID IT. And, by some stoke of luck, I ran FARTHER in those 23 minutes than I did running 25 minutes back in December.

?!?!?!

It was mind-boggling, it truly was.

Until I remembered, I've lost over 15 pounds since then! Plus, Zumba has probably increased my leg strength, endurance and breathing efficiency! I am ecstatic! I was not expecting to do as well as I did and I was practically jumping for joy at the end.

Today I did Zumba sculpt and tone. My quads are sore but it didn't affect my dancing much. I'm thinking I could do Zumba three times a week, plus running 2-3 times a week, and then troupe on Sundays.

I don't want to push myself too hard, but I'm thinking about running my first 5K race this summer and I'd love to do it in under 45 minutes.

More later.

Back on the Zumba Train

Did the cardio party dvd today, which could be day 1 of the fat-loss program, but I don't know if I'll stick like glue to it. I did, however, KILL the routines during the workout. I felt like I was giving one hundred and ten per cent with each move.

I was a sweat mess at the end, and I went through my entire bottle of water faster than usual, but I felt GREAT. Burned at least 450 calories to boot.

I cannot believe I've lost as much weight as I have. I don't really see any big changes on myself, but I know I will once I get closer to my goal weight.

Scary thought, weighing as much as I did in high school. But I am determined. Steady weight loss, focusing on learning healthier habits that will last me a lifetime - that's the way to do it!

Weigh-in tomorrow, and I feel good about it since I ate well today and had a killer workout.

4 weeks and 4 days until Saqra's Showcase. 11 pounds? Doesn't seem like too much of a stretch :D

Toodles!

Weigh-in Sunday!

And I am DOWN 1.5 pounds! That puts me at my goal of losing atleast a pound and a half each week of March/April.

Definitely looking forward to jumping back into Zumba this week, maybe doing some strength training moves to work on my arms a little (the dancing doesn't really target the arms as well as I want to target them).

Loving the results so far. I was 194.2 back at Thanksgiving, and now I weigh 176.5.

Amazing. That's almost 10% weight loss in four months! The mini-wall is gone and I will stop worrying about it! I'll just stick to my calories and exercise regularly and I will continue to see the results!

I don't feel so bad about yesterday anymore.

I do wish, however, that I hadn't taken that day off from Zumba. It's so much fun, and it burns calories like crazy! Today I did the Zumba-live DVD plus the flat abs workout, for a total of one hour and ten minutes of intense dancing and a grand total of 600 calories burned.

Breakfast, with pudding, was less than that, so I'm back on track as long as I don't go overboard today. I'm thinking I'd do a salad for lunch, maybe some left over tortellini pasta... oh yes. Delicious.

I've also looked up the ways in which drinking water helps the body lose weight and it is tremendous! The entire body is made mostly of water, so getting enough is vitally important to overall health. It's hard to stick to a plan to drink more water, and even I have failed at maintaining high water-consumption in the past. But I'm tapping into my true grit, remember, so I am determined to do everything in my power to reach my ultimate weight loss goal of being 145-150 pounds.

Baby is awake! Time to grab some fuel for both of us!

3 Fat Chicks

3fatchicks.com is a forum and article website I joined earlier this week. It's filled with women who are all in the same weight-loss boat. Everyone started at different points, is at different places in their journey, and all have different goals. But everyone is so supportive, and willing to offer advice or encouragement when needed. I have since posted a couple times, and even went so far as to join a challenge group called "Cinco de Mayo Caliente 10-Pound Challenge". There are over ten ladies who've joined the group so far, and we have all pledged to lose ten pounds by the fifth of May this year. Five weeks, approximately, and, though my original goal of being 165 by the end of April is a little steeper than that, there is no law that states I can't lose MORE than the pledged ten pounds.

I've been stuck at a mini-wall with this 178. Yesterday was my mother-in-law's birthday and I ended up going about 400 calories over my budget. I wouldn't have gone over if I had done my Zumba workout for the day, but I skipped it because I was too busy with the party.

I feel pretty gross today, but got right back on track with the diet (except for the cup of chocolate pudding I ate with breakfast today but it wasn't so high in calories! I plan to dance off everything just as soon as my son naps, or even before then.

Tonight we are going out to the restaurant for our weekly double-date, and I will have to see where my calorie count stands before I say whether or not I'll be eating anything there.

Anyway, I just wanted to post about the new site I found. I'm really excited to lose ten more pounds and be part of a group doing the same thing. Accountability! It's a beautiful thing!

I'll post more after my workout.

Zumba Day 6

I was struggling through today's sculpt and tone routine, and decided to forgo the flat abs altogether. I put into it all that I had, though! That's what I love so much about Zumba -- it's not all technical weight-lifting moves that make your muscles shake and take a lot of effort. It's never boring, it's fun to put as much or as little "flavor" as you want into the moves, and the music is really motivating.

Burning 440 calories in 50 minutes is not bad either!

But I'm struggling with my calorie counts big time. That is, I'm having trouble getting enough without eating fast food.

Today I had an egg, ham and cheese bagel with a little Smart Balance spread, plus a cup of blueberries in Greek yogurt sprinkled with organic, low-cal granola. In total, it was 500 calories. For lunch I made a simple salad with 2 cups of spinach, 2.5 oz grilled salmon and a tablespoon of Italian dressing. Only 175 calories and I am full again! After the high-impact Zumba, I still have over 1100 calories I need to consume for dinner and snacks.

Really hard, unless I get Taco Bell at the end of the day. I feel like eating too little is hindering my weight loss a little. I've only lost .2 pounds in 2 days and after eating 1200 calories and so much cardio I feel like I should have lost more.

Oh well. More later I suppose.

Waiting for my son to nap...

So I can do Zumba Day 5! I know, that was supposed to be yesterday but I did a P90X workout with Matt instead.

Not nearly the calorie burn I would've got dancing, but my arms and shoulders got a great workout!

I've still resigned myself to not skipping a day of this Zumba program so I am doing day 5 today. I haven't weighed myself today, but I weighed myself yesterday and I had gained back .4 pounds. That still puts me at 178 and my BMI is exactly 27 (my healthy weight, 145, puts me at 22.5 BMI-wise). That's still overweight. My mini-goal is to be at 165, which puts my BMI in the "healthy" range of below 25.

Well. Doesn't look like little man is headed for a nap. I'll have to dance around him.. he sometimes joins with me, shaking his arms and spinning in circles, but most of the time he ignores me and plays with toys or winds around my feet and becomes a major tripping hazard. haha

So. I'm off to my sweat session be back in an hour or so!

Back! I love dancing so much! Even with sore arms I was able to rock out in front of my TV - even my son cooperated and let me burn those calories!

I'm hungry now... really should have had a quick snack before dancing but decided to just pop in the DVD and go.

Hopefully the scale shows me a number to be proud of tomorrow - I know the scale will tend to go wonky when you start an exercise program but I'd like it to keep trending downward the way it has been this week :D

More tomorrow.

Zumba Day 3

I weighed myself this morning to find that I have LOST .9 pounds! That's almost a whole pound gone in one day! That's even with a black cherry mojito last night, with a grilled chicken sandwich from the restaurant. *Note to self: don't order the hot sauce on the sandwich next time. Get something much more mild.

I consumed around 1700 calories total, and burned about 560 for a net total of 1,150. I could have eaten a bit more and would have been fine. I need to remember to get closer to my goal each day because too little calories can have a negative effect on the body. It's hard to do when you're really trying hard to make sure every calorie you eat is filling and good for you. I never felt hungry yesterday.

I am so excited that this is working. It really is. I was so happy, I made sure to prepare a healthy breakfast for myself, and then I did Zumba Day 3 without even considering skipping it. It was about 45 minutes and my iPod says I burned 390 calories. Tomorrow is a rest day, but I have two hours of dance troupe plus walking to do tomorrow so I'll be logging some exercise to make up for it.

Our next major performance is April 30, which is 40 days away. If I stay on track and lose 1.5 pounds per week, that's a little more than 15 pounds total.

Losing 15 pounds by then would make me happier than anything! I know I've set pretty steep goals for myself before and I rarely reach them in time, but I have tapped into my inner grit and I'm not going to look back and think, "well, I could have done a lot more than I did." No. I want to look back and think "that's why I was so successful - I gave it my all every day."

Because I am going to be successful this year. No whining, just doing.

Grit

Apparently there is a personality trait more important than brains, talent, or ability. People who have the ability to gut it out - to set a far-reaching goal and drive relentlessly toward it, tend to be more successful in everything they attempt.

This makes sense to me. If you never give up, even if you get bored or you lose interest etc., you're going to reach your goals. If you want something bad enough, not even adversity will hold you back, and the trait that does it for you is called grit. It trumps IQ scores, fitness level, etc.

So if you have a goal, tap into your inner grittiness. Some people are born with it; if you weren't, don't worry, you can cultivate it. The first step is to write down your goal and be specific. So instead of saying "I want to lose weight", I'm saying "I want to lose 30 pounds".

The next key is to make sure you're passionate about whatever you're trying to achieve. It's about doing something because you want to - because you truly care about it.

Visualization is the next important part. By imagining yourself attaining that goal and being successful, you make the whole process more "real" and can help you suck it up and keep going. It helps you realize that you WANT to reach the goal and feel like you accomplished something.

Optimism is the last piece of the grit puzzle. Being pessimistic can drag down your spirits, make all your efforts seem in vain. By keeping your head up and viewing the whole process positively, you're less likely to give up after experiencing a few setbacks.

To stay positive, try recording your successes. By writing them down, you can look over them easily if you ever feel like quitting.

I've decided to take all this information to heart. I can be gritty!

Zumba Day 2

Wowee! Zumba kicked my butt today! If I weighed 150 pounds, I would have burned around 530 calories, but since I weigh 30 pounds more than that *sigh*, I probably burned more.

Adding to that, I had a very filling yet low-calorie breakfast today. One large egg over-medium on a whole wheat English muffin with 1 t smart balance butter. I also drank one cup of coffee with 3 T creamer in it. In all, I logged less than 300 calories in, and 560 calories out. I still have 1600 calories left for today!

Now, this is usually where I tell myself I can go upstairs and make myself something greasy to eat. I'm not going to do that. First, because I'm not hungry and second, because I want to have a drink at the restaurant tonight. I've been craving it ever since I saw it in the menu two weeks ago - a black cherry mojito. It's probably between 250 and 350 calories. Add in any wings or appetizers I put in my mouth, and the calorie count could easily go over.

So I am going to look up the restaurant's menu and make my decision BEFORE I get there. This is an excellent tip for anyone trying to lose weight. Decide what you're going to order and count up the calories before you go. Then, don't open your menu so you're not tempted to order something you weren't planning to!

More good news for me: I lost the .4 pounds I gained over the weekend! And I lost .3 pounds more than that! Go me!

Time for a snack, more later.

My Weekend in California!

First off I would like to say that I only gained .4 pounds over my vacation. And I don't know how I pulled that off, considering all I did was lounge in a car and snack on cookies, pretty much. Also, all the stress leading up to the performance was probably not very good for burning calories. Doesn't cortisol and all that force your body to store fat?

Don't quote me on that. I haven't done any research about that.

Anyway, this weekend went awesome! Headed out very early Friday morning and picked everyone up. We were officially on the road around 7 am. A couple stops, ate a Subway six-inch for lunch and two Arby's JR roast beefs and a large Jamocha shake for dinner. Arrived at the hotel at 5:45 pm. Decided to grab drinks at Chevy's. Ate a quarter of a huge plate of nachos and drank one blood orange margarita. Went to Wal-Mart and walked around for a half-hour and then walked home.

Next day, walked back to the mall next to the Wal-Mart and had a Subway six-inch plus chips for lunch. Left my Mountain Dew at the hotel accidentally so didn't drink that until later. Went to the festival and walked all around and sat to watch dancers, and danced for ten minutes in open dance at one point, climbed up and down stairs, etc. Went back to the hotel to get ready for performance. Spent the entire time curling my hair. Went back to the festival where we ate dinner, I had a pita sandwich with fallafel and tahini sauce. Watched more dancers and almost left my purse in the audience. Then went backstage to get dressed for dancing!

Doing our performance after so much anticipation was awesome! Nobody did anything wrong, and afterward we received so many compliments! Got lost on the way home, but thanks to one members' smart phone we made it back to the hotel in one piece! Korin ordered pizza while we went to my Mom's room to watch our DVD of the performance, which was mind-blowing!!! and then I had three slices of very cheesy pizza and a mountain dew before going to bed.

We woke up early, and even had to deal with a lost hour of sleep for daylight saving, got everything packed up and was out of the hotel at 8 am. Snacked on my cookies and pudding and bought myself a diet Dr. Pepper. We went through a crazy rain storm mid-Oregon but came through it alright. We dropped everyone off and at 7 pm I got to hold my baby for the first time in days! My mom and Jeri and Dino all used my bathroom before heading out again, and that was the official end of our vacation.

I was happy with everything. No major issues with the ladies in our car or room, and we had a lot of laughs.

Time to weigh myself today and see if I have lost that .4 yet!

...Nope. I didn't. I didn't lose anything. But I didn't gain either! That's wonderful news :) I just have to dig deep, do my Zumba with as much passion as I can muster and continue to make good meal choices like I did yesterday.

Yesterday for breakfast I had one bowl raisin bran with 1/2 cup whole milk. Brunch I had one egg cooked over medium with 1 T shredded cheese over a toasted sourdough English muffin and 1/2 T smart balance butter. I had a cup of coffee with 1/4 cup creamer. For lunch I had 5 pieces breaded chicken with 1/4 cup orange sauce and 1/2 cup cooked jasmine rice. For dinner I had a cup of chicken noodle soup, and I bought myself a diet Dr. Pepper. I did the Zumba sculpt and tone DVD, and worked up a good sweat!

I don't know how many calories in and out I logged, but in my book the day was a success!

Hopefully the work shows up on the scale soon. Saqra's showcase is April 30th and I am scheduled to perform twice! That gives me 6 weeks to lose at least five pounds, hopefully closer to ten. My goal is to Zumba five times a week, drink 6-8 ounces of water before every meal, start running again (set date to start soon!), avoid eating out like it's the plague, and prepare myself good food here at home. If I want to lose 5 pounds in the next three weeks, I can't go over 1500 calories per day.

That isn't difficult if I stay away from fast food. And I've resigned myself to dig deep and keep my eyes on the prize! I'll probably restart my food journal - it helped keep me accountable!

More later, I read an article this week about "True Grit" and I want to discuss how this personality trait could help anyone trying to lose weight.

I haven't lost much...

I'm right around 179.5, but it is a loss since last week so I am pretty pleased! We've been eating out a lot, so I'm not surprised I didn't lose more than a half-pound, though I HAVE been very good about the choices I make while I'm out.

My diet is about to be blown to hell, though. I'm making and packing lots of sugary goodies for the trip. Cookies, rice krispie treats, pudding, wheat thins, circus animals, etc. I'll also bring fruit cups, soup and my water bottle, but whatever else I need I'm going to have to purchase there.

I've got my clothes and hygiene supplies packed, need to charge up all the electronics and pack those, and then, like I said, make my treats to bring...

Hopefully I can stay busy enough to where the time flies by and I won't have a moment to worry about leaving my baby boy, or messing up our routine on stage. Scary.

My best friend is coming with, and I'm really looking forward to the mini-vacation and getting to spend time with her and my mom, and our troupe ladies. They're all very nice, and fun and the 12 hour car ride won't seem so bad I'm sure.

After this trip, I'll be jumping right back on the exercise/healthy eating/losing more WEIGHT horse. Five to ten more pounds by Saqra's Showcase in late April? I can do that!

This time next week...

I will be in California!!! It's so exciting, but also very nerve-wracking. Ive never been that far away from my son and I've never spent the night away from him... (I don't count the three nights he spent in the NICU when he was two weeks old). I feel a touch of anxiety when I imagine him waking up Friday morning and I'm not there, and him going to bed and waking up and I'm AGAIN not there... and then going to be and waking up Sunday morning to discover I still haven't returned... I'm fighting back tears because I know he won't understand the reasons I have to leave, and he's too young to understand that his Mommy will be home in a few days. He'll be okay, but I don't know if I will be.

On the weight-loss front, I did one of Matt's P90X workouts, the shoulders and arms one, with him on Tuesday and I never started the second round of Zumba. Had the best of intentions, but other things got in the way.

I did, however, weigh in at 179.9 Wednesday morning!!!! I'm in the 170s! I haven't been down in this range since my first trimester of pregnancy with my son.

That was two years ago.

Needless to say I'm VERY excited :) I've made up my mind to continue on down from here! I'll have to stick with the Zumba better than I have this week, and I need to keep on myself about portion control and liquid calories.

One week. One week to look my best. I can do it!

Zumba Day 10

I had to skip yesterday's Day 9. For some reason, during my rest day my hamstrings on both legs painfully tightened up and they were so sore I couldn't imagine dancing around on them.

Today they were better, but definitely not at 100%. I decided to pop some Advil and do the workout, because I hate missing days.

Having completed this program (though I did not follow it to the letter), I would definitely recommend it to anyone. It's a lot of fun, while also being an incredibly intense workout. You WILL sweat! And you will have a blast doing it, because I know I did!

I found myself MAKING time for my workouts, whereas before when I wasn't fully committed I wouldn't make it a priority. It always took a backseat to what was CONVENIENT to do. My favorite convenient thing to do was watch TV or play around on the internet. Now I look forward to my son's nap so I can pop in the Zumba DVD and dance around and lose weight!

And I am losing weight, the family is starting to notice. They complimented me all yesterday and my mom even said last week that I'm looking more toned.

Well, the California trip is in 2 weeks. I'm going to troupe practice tomorrow and then I am restarting the ten-day program on Monday! That means the Wednesday before we leave will be my last day and hopefully I will look amazing! Five more pounds? Doable!

Just have to avoid making more blueberry cobbler... that was a BAD (albeit delicious!) decision. Goals: drink lots of water each day, limit coffee and full-sugar soda. Make healthy meals, stick to the calorie allotment

Zumba Day 7

This is my 50th post! Go me!

I just finished Zumba Day 7 of their 10-day Weight Loss program, and I feel awesome! Yesterday's workout left me feeling SO sore today, my abs and back hurt something fierce, and my legs feel so heavy!

But I did the 50 minute Cardio Party DVD and I rocked it as best I could!

And I will continue to push myself to not skip workouts - they don't get boring, and they're SO fun. Tomorrow is a designated rest day, and I may actually give myself a rest. If I feel up to it, I will try out the 20-minute Express routine, because I am in LOVE with the results I'm seeing!

The last time I weighed myself on my Mom's scale at her studio, which was six weeks ago, it said I weighed 185.5 which was an amazing number considering it said I weighed 191 only two weeks before that. Today, I weighed myself again.

180!!! I'm so excited! Eleven pounds GONE in 8 weeks, and I vow to NEVER put that weight back on! I'm almost down in the 170's again! I haven't been there in over two years!

My plan is to continue choosing healthy meals, eating salads and vegetables without dressings, drinking water, and nothing high in (empty) calories, avoiding sweets and salty snacks, and picking only whole grains and other complex carbs.

I definitely don't think I'll be down to my original goal of 165 by March 11, but I am excited to be near 175 by then!

Zumba Day 6

Last Sunday was my first rest day, but I have troupe practice that day and since we are preparing for our trip to California we danced for the better part of THREE HOURS. And then we went and did a ten-minute performance.

Performances always wipe me out more than practice does, since it's so high-energy and you've got adrenaline pumping through you and you're smiling and sweating and, not to mention, you're wearing at least ten pounds worth of beads and fabric.

Overall, it was a fun night. But I did NOT miss the Zumba workout!

Monday I did the cardio party, and today was sculpt+tone and the flat abs routine. I was sweating the entire hour-long session!

The funny thing about Zumba, though, is that you feel SO energized afterward. I feel like I could go out and run a mile or two! I don't feel drop-dead tired like I did after the regular interval strength training and cardio yet I know I got just as good of a workout!

At any rate, I'm halfway through my first ten days, I've lost about a half-pound so far, but I have noticed my pants are slightly looser. Maybe their promise is for real! How nice would that be???

Teehee. Even if I don't lose a ton of weight, I'm going to do the 10-day program over again after I finish this first round. Then I'll take a few days to rest before the California trip, and hopefully I'll look better than I have in a long time!

Fingers crossed...

Zumba Days 1 and 2

My Zumba DVDs arrived in the mail two days ago, and I am in love with this form of exercise! I've always loved dancing, and I love how sweaty I get during belly dance troupe each week, but my body has become accustomed to the moves and I don't think two hours of dance a week is enough to kick my butt into shape.

I heard about Zumba for the first time over a year ago. My sisters both asked if I wanted to go with them to the local community center and take a class with them. At the time, Jamison was less than four months old, so I declined. But my interest in Zumba was peaked and I began looking into it over the summer last year. I wanted to take a weekly class at the college this winter but it didn't work out. Then I found out the grange hall down the street from our house offered classes twice a week, but they were on nights I had other things to do.

So as the last resort: I purchased the DVDs online. And I love them! I just finished the first hald of day 2 of the 10-day accelerated weight loss plan, which is the sculpt and tone workout. I still need to do the flat abs workout but I'm expecting company and don't have time now. I'll do it later. But let me tell you - I am covered in a layer of sweat! And near the end of the routine my arms were shaking and my moves were not energetic in the least... but I finished and it feels more like I went to a party than anything else.

More information on the 10-day plan: They claim I could lose up to an entire pant size in ten days if I follow their calendar of workouts and I adhere to their nutrition guide.
Well, the guide basically has me eating nothing but protein and barely any carbohydrates, which, yes, that will cause you to lose weight but I'm not going to stick to that at all, so I plan to eat as healthy as possible, stick to my calorie budget for the week and see how it goes. There are two rest days built into the calendar but I might throw in the express routines on those days just to get more cardio.

I'm going to get it done and I'm not going to make excuses! There are twenty days until we leave for California and my goal is to be down to 170 pounds by then.

More later.

Being sick sucks

As does taking care of a 16 month old who caught the cold you had... atleast we aren't sick together. I'm at the tail-end of a cold that kicked my butt... and I'm not one to let sniffles or a headache interfere with my life.

It started Thursday night with a stuffed nose and a throat tickle and my Saturday morning I had every symptom in the book. Needless to say, I haven't done much exercise since then. I kinda fell off the wagon with the 10 pound Slimdown, but you know what?

This morning I weighed myself and I'm down to 181!!!! Ten pounds gone since the beginning of the year!!!

I guess six weeks isn't a bad length of time in which to lose ten pounds. I've purchased two pairs of pants recently, neither of which fit as tightly as they did brand new, so I'm VERY pleased with that.

Also, my arms continue to gain definition, and I'm looking forward to running again soon so I can get gorgeous gams to match!

A couple bellydance performances coming up, maybe I'll even need to take in my costume! That would be excellent, and I definitely wouldn't mind doing the extra sewing if it came about because I had lost weight!

California trip is a month away. Going to firm up as much as I can in the next four weeks to prepare. Certainly I could do another 5 or ten pounds between now and then, right?

Also- I purchased the Zumba DVDs! They will be here next week (hopefully), and I'm really looking forward to sweating my buns off!

It's amazing what you can do...

...when you finally put your mind to DOING it. I honestly cannot think of a reason why I didn't just DO this last year, why I spent so much time fretting about food or being able to find time to exercise.

It isn't hard. When you're overweight, the only thing that's truly difficult is controlling your portion sizes and going without sugary drinks.

Seriously, it's all in the calorie count. And it's very simple. Find a calorie calculator that will show you how many calories you need to eat each day (I like this one). Me, I shouldn't eat more than 1200 calories per day if I want to reach 165 lbs by mid-March.

When you're used to consuming twice that amount in one day, this does seem like starving yourself. But you're not. You're retraining your stomach to feel full with NORMAL portion sizes in it.

And if you're serious about losing the weight, it doesn't even seem like a punishment.

Case-in-point: On January 1 of this year, when I made my resolution, I weighed 191 on Wii Fit.

I weighed myself this morning and I'm around 7 pounds lighter. Boo. YAH.

Matt needs the computer so he can study but I'll write more soon.

Family Christmas!

Our family decided a few years ago to give up trying to do everyone's Christmas plans ON Christmas day, because all us sisters were trying to be with each other AND with our boyfriend's/husband's (respective) families all within 12 hours. Add in the children and the holiday seemed more like 12 hours of hell than a nice relaxing and fun day.

So we decided we could live with have two Christmas Days. The 25th apart, and another day during January when we could all get together and exchange gifts and eat finger foods.

That day, this year, was yesterday. We went to out mom's studio, because that was the only place big enough, really. I won't go into the details or list all the gifts given, because it doesn't actually relate to my blog. What is relevant is what I put in my mouth and what kind of exercising I did.

Needless to say, I ate a lot of junk. Atleast, it really FELT like I ate a lot of junk. That night, when I wrote everything down, I realized that I hadn't had a ridiculous amount.

A handful of crackers, a couple small bites of cheese, a small slice of salami, a couple small slices of turkey, two apple slices (no caramel dipping sauce!) and one two-inch piece of Rice Krispies treats, homemade. Add in a big diet Dr. Pepper and the calorie count isn't sky-high.

However, earlier that day I had an entire Costco Poppy Seed muffin to myself, and later that night I ate a Fast Break candy bar. That is most likely what pushed my calorie count over, but I'm making up for it today. For breakfast I had one egg cooked over-medium on top of a plain, whole-wheat english muffin. 200 calories and I'm still satisfied even though it's been a couple of hours since I ate.

I read around the internet that drinking 16 oz of water around 10-15 minutes before eating has been proven to help you eat less calories and, subsequently, lose more weight if you're trying to slim down. Because your stomach already has water in it, there will be less room for food. Your brain will receive "I'm full!" signals from your stomach after eating less that you would if you started chowing down with empty tanks.

That being said, I'm definitely going to start trying this, starting tonight at dinner, and at restaurants too. It's easy to order water along with your regular drink, and it doesn't cost any extra! In fact, you could save a lot of money if you replaced all your drinks with water (as long as it isn't bottled!). No more buying 4-dollar fancy coffee drinks from Starbucks, no more soda, cut out sugary "juice" drinks, etc. You'll save around 150 calories per 8 oz (depending on the drink), and after replacing a weeks worth of drinks (about 25) you'll have lost a pound! (In other words, you'll have cut out 3500 calories.) I have a really nice water bottle I use and I try to keep it full all day, I find that I drink atleast one full bottle (24 ounces) in a day, usually two, and a full bottle for every workout I do.

Speaking of workouts I completed week 4 of the 10 Pound Slimdown program! And I did all the workouts for this week on the day the calendar said to, and I didn't skip ANY! Go me! Monday and Tuesday are the last two days of the 30-day program, so I think I'll just go back to day 1 and start the whole thing over. I've lost 5 pounds! I'm loving my arms, and if I flex my calf muscles I can see definition starting to come out there too!

Also good news: the pants I bought a few days before Christmas last year (which were a size 16. UGH!) are a little loose! They didn't fit in the waist to begin with (I have to fit pants to my widest part: hips and butt!) but now they don't stay up at all! Also, both pairs of my old maternity jeans are officially falling apart and cannot be worn anymore, which couldn't come at a better time, because I'm finally shrinking!

I just stepped away from the computer to try on my old size 11 jeans, and I could only pull one of them up all the way. Even if I could wear them, I don't know if I would considering the shape they're in. Once I get down to my goal weight I think I'll throw them all away. I may keep my favorite pair, but the others need to go. I'm only keeping them now to use as a means of tracking my progress. Once I look good in my old jeans, I'll know I did it.

And, having really started to see changes, I'll definitely be keeping it up. It's just a matter of deciding to DO it, and to give it your all.

And, apparently, splurging a tiny bit on special occasions.

Next special occasion: MY BIRTHDAY! I'll be turning 21!
But no crazy drinking binge for me. If I wasn't a mom I'd probably resign myself to getting drunk but I'd rather have a nice dinner with my fiance and go see a good movie, and maybe stop somewhere for a drink. Nothing fancy.

Update on the Resolutions

These first two weeks of 2011 have had a few ups and downs, for sure!

I've implemented a lot of the resolutions I set out to achieve and I have been seeing big differences already.

With Matthew, we definitely don't have as many negative interaction. I go out of my way frequently to do nice things for him and I head off arguments by taking care of the things that trigger mean words.

Like keeping our place clean. It's not hard, but it goes undone sometimes and then we both get frustrated, because we both feel the other person is not doing their part. At the moment, I'm a tad behind on the cleaning because I had a lot going on yesterday and our schedule was a bit wayward. Today is the same, but I plan to do pick up once I get home from the studio tonight.

One awesome thing that happened over the weekend is that the Tiger Lilies (my mother's dance troupe) participated in a call-in to secure a spot at one of the biggest belly dance festivals on the west coast and it only took us 20 minutes to get through! We officially have a dance spot and we are going to California on March 11.

That gives me two months to lose a couple pounds. My goal is to be at 165 by that time, which I know is pretty steep but I've made up my mind to do as much as I can to get as close as I can.

Since Jan 1, I've written down everything I've put in my mouth, at what time, and I wrote how I felt after eating. I haven't started to count the calories because I wanted to start listening to my body and eat only when I'm truly hungry, and stop eating when I'm full. I've cut out extraneous snacking, I've scaled back portions, and I allow myself a couple extra bites only occasionally.

Also, I've been following the 10 Pound Slimdown program and the videos are getting easier, I'm almost able to do all the high-impact cardio and strength moves and I only sometimes modify or go slower than tempo.

Together, these changes have made a big difference. For the first time, the bathroom scale I use at my mom's studio has finally budged.

I've lost nearly five pounds! I almost couldn't believe it, considering I had eaten almost a whole burrito from Chipotle not two hours prior to weighing myself - but it's true! According to that scale I'm at 185.5. Considering I had been holding steady at 190 between Halloween and New Years Eve last year, that's pretty damn impressive to me!

I wish I had before and after pictures of my arms, because they are looking more and more toned each week, and I can finally feel my calf muscles again!

All this makes me believe that, if I keep it up, I could possibly lose 15 more pounds. But I'll have to really watch calorie intake/output, eliminate liquid calories, up my cardio, and eat more vegetables.

Totally doable, I think. It'll take willpower, definitely, but if I want this I should just DO it. No excuses. Because the scale and the clothes don't lie, so if I want results I'm going to put in the effort.

2011 New Year's Resolutions!

Happy 2011 everyone! Don't you just love New Year's Day? It's like the first, unmarked page in a new journal or sketch pad - full of opportunities and possibilities, waiting for you to fill with marks and words and... well, LIFE!

It's also the first day to implement those resolutions... and I have a list of my own I'd like to share with you.

I'd like my relationship with Matthew to have more romance, more fun, more spontaneity and more sex.

I'd like to spend at least one hour each day playing with my son one-on-one without the TV, computer, iPod or cell phone on.

I'd like to lose atleast 40 pounds. I want to fit a size 11 pair of jeans again.

I'd like to blog/journal/write more often. I'd also like to crochet more items and possibly sell them.

I'd like to complete the C25K program, and also the Bridge to 10K program as well.

I'd like to compete in, and at least place in, a bellydance competition this year.

I'd like our house to stay clean - I'd like to pick up daily, do a full-clean once a week and a top-to-bottom deep clean once a month.

I'd like to begin getting our finances in order so that we may move into our own apartment by the end of 2012 (hopefully much sooner).

I have already written these goals down and have started outlining the details so that I may be successful in reaching them.

I know they are all doable. I know I have it in me to complete the little daily tasks that will make this year the best yet.